I picture Lily Tomlin reading it on a blank stage. She does amazing work, you know?

Hello? Is this the complaints department? I'd like to file a complaint.

I don't remember signing up for this so this might be a mistake, anyway.

I'm a grown up; an "adult", if you will. I don't remember ticking that box when I signed the contract.

Someone has gone and left me in charge. I have all the answers. I'm the one people dump their problems on. I am the one who, without staying late, helps the company grind to a halt. It was I that sent someone home sick and I, again, who approved a request of someone to go home early.

This is ridiculous. I mean, I know I'm not on the "kiddy-contract" anymore but this is getting out of hand. I have a husband. I run a household. I deal with suppliers. I make decisions with thousands of dollars. People look to me for advice. When does it stop?

All my life, they tell me that one does not just wake up one day and flick a switch and become an adult, but that is certainly what it feels like has happened here.

I'm just checking with you to see if there's been a mix up in my account? Are you certain that *this* is the right life?

No, no. I like the husband; certainly I don't want a different one. This one seems to fit my habits and prejudices.

No, I find the work fulfilling most of the time. It's challenging but usually to my skill level. I'm not sure that changing that would be the answer.

Mostly, I just wanted to check, has something - anything - been entered wrong on my file? Is this really my life?

Because I don't want to get used to this and find out there's been a mistake.

Is it possible to get this noterized, in some way? I wouldn't want someone to do an audit and realize there's been a mistake and put in for a recall.